Every summer has it’s pros and cons.

Haha, I got like 77 drafts full of blog posts waiting to be published, but I never get around to it.

There are some very interesting topics in there actually but I just forget to finish the posts cause I’m so consumed by thoughts, oops.

Anyway, we’re already past the middle of the summer and it’s the first summer ever (or well since I can remember) that I have not worked and it’s…hmm…gives you a lot of free time. I’ve enjoyed late mornings, I’ve binged watched quite many series, read a lot of comics and done a ton of summer school assignments. There is still some weird feeling of unfulfillment though…I’m doing everything I’ve wanted to do all year, no responsibility and chill life all day every day, but there is a lack of routine and purpose which drives me insane. If I don’t choose to get up from bed and do something with my day, no one will bat an eye. No meeting I need to attend or a friend I need to see (tho ofc if I really want to, I could arrange that) or pretty much anything! The only urgent matter in this household is the food shopping.

I’m long out of my favorite apartment ever and I’m super sad about it, but I had to give it up…At least I passed it on to Joel’s friend Arttu who is super cool and would do it justice, so that’s about the only consolation I have.

13702291_10207067892955616_1155833300_o

And pretty much all I wanna do is party and have fun, which is quite normal for a 21 year old, but this part of me has been so exaggerated during this past year, I feel like I’m a completely new person. Still the same in a lot of ways, but I’ve completely expanded my musical horizons, I listen to things I would never have found even remotely good 2 years ago. I’ve become a lot more morally flexible, things which I would have considered bad before, have appeared to be gray now and the line between right and wrong is very washed up, which has made me complicate things a bit more than usual. I’ve become more extraverted and I’m enjoying time spent with others more than the time I have with myself (though I value that too as long as it’s not months at a time). I love being busy, having stuff to do, places to visit and people to see even if it’s just for a movie or a short conversation. So yeah, I’ve tried to go out as much as I can.

13720658_10207067892475604_1973547931_o

I’ve started seeking new thrills and more ways to feel a different range of emotions and my anxiety while still present, has eased up a little bit. I still find it difficult talking to strangers on the phone or approaching them in unfamiliar situations, but I’ve forced myself to be more open. Though now I have issues with contacting friends, cause I start thinking that they don’t wanna talk to me cause if they did, they would contact me first. Idk, man it’s weird.

Weirdest thing is that I’m the exact opposite of shy and quiet which is the stereotype for people suffering from anxiety, but I guess it could happen to anyone! At least my personality is still very happy.

Life is still pretty cool otherwise, I just wish I would stop stressing about things as much and also get myself more busy, find something stimulative to do with my time and stop playing the martyr…but it’s like that every summer so!😀 I don’t really enjoy this season, because everyone is away and I get this crippling feeling of loneliness for 3 months straight until things get back to normal and I get to be happy with my life again. The weather is amazing, but I have no one to enjoy it with, so what’s the point…

So what should I do with all this free time besides try and find a job? (another thing that has been stressing me out yayy!)

//Stef – ughhhh

Stefani is rude and arrogant.

Hello people!

Got drunk again few days ago (surprise surprise) with a few peeps and some of them started opening their mouth about other people trash talking me behind my back.

Nothing major and I’m not even offended, in fact I’m pretty happy about this. Cause if a few people have things against you (note A FEW, not ALL), then you must be doing something right.

I can completely see why someone would call me rude and arrogant, I’m not questioning it one bit. You people are not completely off from the full picture. But I like to call myself honest and confident and I’ll explain why it is a different thing.

First off in Finland it is not widely appreciated to say the first thing that comes to your mind. I’m very impulsive and hot-headed, but I never really say anything that I don’t mean. I’m one of the most honest people I know and if the truth makes you feel uncomfortable then sure, I’m rude. I agree that I have a strong personality and you can see it through my opinions, but being rude on purpose? Come ooooon. I’d never call out on anyone for their shit just to hurt them, in fact I hope they become better people/leaders after my truth tea.

I have no interest in leading anyone or anything, if I would, I’d already be where I wanted. I just wanna have fun and party and if you annoy me, I’ll let you know after what I will forget about it. I’d say this is the best thing ever, cause I don’t hold grudges against anyone unlike some of you apparently. If that makes me rude, I will gladly accept it.

And about the arrogance thing I am THRILLED. It took me years and years to come as far as I am today confidence wise and thank goodness it’s working. I had a very fucked up father who would explain to me very often how I wasn’t actually all that special and there were others better than me. It sucked. But I am seriously a strong woman and I don’t see any reason why I should keep my head down and think lowly of myself. I am awesome and great to be around, a good friend and I dare say a good person all around. That my friends, is confidence.

I would be arrogant if I thought I was better than everyone else, but here’s where society is fucking up again. In order for me to feel better than you, I need to firstly compare. The only time I did that was when I had a crush on a guy and his ex gf was a stripper. But I compared for obvious reasons.😀 Sure I’m not as skinny as some girls or as good looking or as smart or as WHATEVER…but like, no matter who I compare myself to, they are not ME and this is the best part, cause I think that I PERSONALLY AND IN PARTICULAR am amazing, which is not to say that other people aren’t. And you can’t tell me shit about self-love and narcissism, cause that also has nothing to do with you and you don’t get affected by it.

I don’t look in front of the mirror for hours on end thinking how great I am, though if someone else is, I can only say – kudos, glad you are okay with yourself in a world, where everyone else has self-esteem issues. And I have some, as well like most normal people. But I don’t talk about them, cause I don’t let them define me. Be strong for crying out loud!

Anyway, I just wanted to say that I’m glad someone thinks I’m rude and arrogant, cause I probably am a little bit, but I love it and thanks again to that person, who said it cause I’ve been feeling good about myself ever since. I ain’t just your average girl, who blends well with the background, so I understand you guys completely if you have some beef with me.

But srsly I don’t care, haha!😀 I have better things to do. Like fall asleep blissfully knowing I’m awesome.

Snapchat-749615319240436143

//Stef

P.S: I hope I have not come across as too self-centered, people are free to think what they will though my intentions weren’t to put more fuel to the fire, but rather to explain myself.:) We all have many faults and I can do better in many situations, but this is how I am and I’ve chosen to accept it and have learned to like it. That’s all. Have a great evening, everyone!:)

Once upon a time I messed up again today.

Lemme tell you guys a few stories!

Story 1: Once upon a time I had a project in calculating financial data and it all went to shit, cause I’m a lazy mofo that procrastinates till the very last day and I spent 9 hours in school today trying to sort my life out by staring at an excel sheet and feeling dumber than a first grader.

Tell me, is it possible to actually become dumber at the age of 20? Or is it just this course that makes the prospect of a career in stripping (an otherwise atrocious idea for all other peeps involved) kinda tempting? I’m in the mood for quitting modern life and becoming a nun, but I know I gotta stay in school, so I could provide for my future cat. It isn’t easy sometimes.

Story 2: Once upon a time I was drunk again last week and have been AGAIN sending some weird shit to people I haven’t seen in ages. My choir teacher from 7th grade, for example…I’ve sent her a video of me having an absolute blast singing along to “Traktor Alban” by Sås o Kopp. She doesn’t even speak swedish???

2016-03-05 11.05.05 2

U know, I really love drunk me, but she’s not the most trustworthy person I know. I really don’t trust her and neither should you. No one is safe, not even you guy from the grocery store I met 3 years ago! I don’t know what it is about alcohol, it makes me think that I’m the most interesting person you’ve ever met in your life and I just HAVE TO show you what I’m up to…

Story 3: I started taking birth control pills (for my skin you perverts, we all know that I’m a pure little diamond and I’m waiting till marriage) and DUUUUUUUUDE, I’m on such a hardcore emotional roller coaster! It’s been about 2 weeks and I’ve felt all the spectrum of human emotions including extreme paranoia (Try to find some old posts on fb, just try, I dare ya), happiness and depression (yep a day apart from each other).

I suspect that everyone secretly hates me and talks shit behind my back, life just turned “The Bold and the Beautiful”, Joel hasn’t properly spoken to me in a month, he must not wanna be friends with me anymore, although I know that’s complete bullshit, he’s just busy being himself and not giving a shit. But Claire might be going to Belgium for 5 months, Sophie is moving back to Borgå, we’re not going to Pampas Nationaldag and I just don’t know what is happening, I feel like my life is about to change and I really don’t like this, okay? Also can everyone stop being healthy AF for a moment and instagram their goddamn 3 pizza slices instead of the green smoothie they just made or the gym tank they just bought, it’s stressing me out.

Story 4: Once upon a time I also kinda did a thing I shouldn’t have done last week, but it was so hilarious tho! I hope there won’t be any consequences, but lemme tell ya what I found out about myself (if you haven’t noticed, this is a very ME ME ME kinda post):

I am so bloody awesome, I don’t care what some ppl think, I am AMAZING at amusing myself, I literally sometimes wake myself up in bed and start laughing, cause I’m so damn funny (Sophie can confirm and she’s sick of it), if you can make me laugh as hard as I can make me laugh, you get +100 brownie points!

A part of the story is also how actually lately I’ve started to care what people think about me A LOT. I’ve never been rude to strangers unless they deserve it, but now I’m extra nice and I’m trying to compensate for a lot of other things that I think are wrong with me, including the ever so present need to be in your face 24/7. Sorreeeeeeh!

But bottom line is that I still need a hug, 7 shots of vodka, a calendar and a few motivational speeches for the next few months, cause shit is real out there.

//Stef – cheers

“You’re not the kind of friend I need in my life”

Yep.

Someone I really care about told me this a while back and it’s been bugging me ever since.

Do you ever get these kind of people in your life, who are completely random and for some reason you don’t take them seriously and you think they’re playing some sort of a game with you, because they’re genuinely so nice and you’re confused as to how you perceive them? Hadn’t happened to me until recently…

All of my other friends thought it was a weird situation and hence I believed it, too. It was weird…really weird. But so what? She was being amazing from day 1 and never really stopped being bomb. It frustrates me that my brain can not get over the fact that I care about this girl more than I had intended to, but I also need a break from her. It’s toxic for me to trip myself out for stuff that have already come and gone and I don’t even really care about the story, I just…I care about her and I feel like in some way I have mistreated her and she didn’t deserve any of it. Though I have been 100% honest the entire time and I didn’t mean to hurt anyone at any point, seems like I’ve managed to do something wrong, idk.

Seriously, I have such a weird conscience, I don’t feel bad about a lot of the things I’ve done that I should feel bad about, but for some reason this is gonna haunt me for a long time. Because I’m a person who treasures friendship above great many things and no one has EVER told me that they don’t need me in their life as a friend before that. Cause I’m a good friend. I honestly am. I make sure that you get home safely and I genuinely care about your problems, I try to help in any way I can, if I see you’re in a situation where someone is hurting you, I’d make it a mission to get you out of it no matter what the costs. I give a lot of things for my friends and I enjoy being there for them. So it sucks when someone doesn’t get it.

Not gonna lie, the girl has every right to feel this way (if she still does, I don’t really know) and I did feel very appreciated by her in such a short period of time, there is literally not a single bad thing I could say about her and in contrast there are plenty of questionable things I could say about myself. I don’t know, I was in a situation where I didn’t think about how it would look from an outsider point of view, or maybe I just didn’t care but either way I know I’m not a bad person and there are lots of variables. I’m not gonna get into details about the case, cause it’s somewhat irrelevant to why I’m feeling so shitty about this girl and because that’s not really the entire reason either.

I do feel like I was made to sound a bit more bad than I actually was, lots of quotes gotten out of context and lots of intentions which remained hidden, but actually I don’t really care at this point, I’ll take all the blame for everything, because it’s just easier than to point fingers and call people names every time you think someone is twisting the truth. And also because there’s no single truth to be discovered. It’s all just different points of view and every person is living their own truth, so there’s no point in straightening things out, when it really really doesn’t matter. Maybe I’m the one twisting things and maybe I’m the one telling things wrong, but in my mind I’ve been as honest as I can ever be. But as I said, it doesn’t matter.

All that matters is how she sees things. I wish I could just say this to her, but I feel like this has been talked about so much that I don’t wanna reopen the case, I just want the quiet. It’s been so good ever since I stopped talking about it with her. I’ve felt great and getting past the ridiculous situation lifted a lot of weirdness from my chest. However I do kinda miss her and I wish I could go out with her and just chill, but I’m not sure if we’re ready for each other. I wanna prove that I’m a good friend and that I think she’s a great and fun girl to be around and I just HOPE that one day I can do that.:) I smile every time I see her pictures and no matter how many times my friends say I shouldn’t be in contact with her, I kinda like following her on instagram and seeing her snapstories…

I dunno why I made this post, probably only like 3 ppl know who I’m talking about and this is wayyy too long, but I just needed to let it out of my system I guess. That I regret being a shitty friend to someone who doesn’t deserve it and that I genuinely wish her all the best annnnd sorry for the whole fucking thing and I hope some day we’ll get past it. I guess I think about her every now and then and it’s only good stuff, so she deserves lots of cuddles and wine and other nice things. Yep.

Other than that I’ve had a lot of good times, I mainly like to do my makeup and drink on Fridays to forget what a disappointment I am to myself every now and then.😀 It works pretty well. I also sometimes party on days other than Friday, but no one is looking, so whatever. I’ll try to make more youtube videos since I’ve found them to be very therapeutic and cool to make, so stay tuned for that. And here u go a selfie from last week when yes – you guessed it – I partied with mi frendz.

TGIF

Good night for now.

//Stef

Unpublished bits and pieces from my phone.

Sup!

So umm, I guess I’m getting worse and worse at keeping this blog going, but let’s make another attempt at it anyway!

Dude, I’ve got 70 drafts ready to be published, but I always feel like half of the shit in each of them is too personal and I don’t want to share it with the world. It probably isn’t that bad and to be frank most of you don’t really care, so I don’t actually have anything to be afraid of. I hope.

I know I promised to make a Soundtrack of my life vol.7 post, but to be honest my past year of music has been VERY different than what I’ve listened to before and I’m not ready for people to start pointing fingers at me and label me as a mainstream consumer, who is brainwashed and doesn’t have an opinion of her own and all that blablabla stuff that come with listening to more modern music. Tho I’ve enjoyed a lot of good songs, so maybe I should after all not care and put it all in a post…let’s see!

Anyway, THIS post is just a random update with pictures mostly screenshotted from snapchat and you can find the occasional selfies made with my phone’s actual camera. I just got a new phone and I’ve been so vain with the selfies, since the camera is just super good…best purchase ever!

201601112003026688

This is from when we were in England (came back 2 weeks ago), we had an epic trip and I took lots of pics and I think the highlight for me (besides all the obvious shopping) was Nando’s. I’m absolutely devastated that they don’t have it here in Finland, cause it was easily one of the best foods I’ve tasted. I strongly recommend it to you guys, if you’re ever in England, GO FOR IT!!!

2016-01-10 10.49.31 1

Some pic of me trying stuff on, I thought the jacket looked bomb AF, so I got it. Now I just need to wait for it get warmer. Sigh.

AmgsOgsVZFkda1PXch6VJQJmq8tuUU-mvCDqQDx0D5Gs

This was taken in December before me and Sophie decided to have our tipaton tammikuu and leave the booze for February. I love getting drunk with this girl.

Snapchat-3398723188927414502

Snapchat-9214931170187331352Screenshot_2016-01-30-01-47-19b9956774-a3f8-4ee1-951c-06eb12c72f05421212433_8581

Needless to say our tipaton was arguably unsuccessful and we realized that alcohol solves so many problems. Or even if it doesn’t, it makes you forget about them. I still enjoy not having bad hangovers, so I try to take advantage of that as much as possible and have a great time! Besides, there’s always a reason to drink. A boy doesn’t want you? Your friend is going on exchange? You don’t know what you’re doing with your life? You’re sexually confused? You failed a course? You passed a course? It’s margarita monday? It’s pikku launatai? Your friend really wants to sing karaoke? Or they’re sad and need you to tell them that this fuckboy ain’t shit and you need to watch them agree with each shot they take? You wanna help someone get laid? You wanna get laid yourself? You need inspiration for your thesis topic? I can keep going forever…

But yeah anyway, we had an incredible night (in my opinion), apparently I don’t remember all of it, cause Stina almost strangled me for not believing I’ve done half of the shit she says I’ve done. Daniel said that this was the most fucked up he’s ever seen me and we’ve been out partying a lot together, so that should say something. Nothing to be proud of, but anyway all I remember was that I had a kick ass time throughout the entire evening and Sophie brought a male exchange student to my place without warning me, so me and Zselyke were in our underwear when I answered the door. Lol. Sophie’s drunkenness is another story for another time, she also had lots of fun. Actually, even Claire did. EVERYONE enjoyed. So happy we didn’t jinx it by looking forward to it for too long, but yes! Can’t wait for next friday and the next party.

photo_2016-01-26_21-15-02

Welp, January has also been SUPER MOTHERFUCKING COLD. Well except for the last few days, now everything is melting and it’s annoying. But -27 degrees, when we left Helsinki for London, though. Bloody freezing. Kind of happy that it’s warming up.

Student life wise things are going okay, I still need to get my act together and apply for internships and maybe take a few reports a bit more seriously, but other than that I’m quite content. I’m taking a course where we mix cocktails and taste them and it’s absolutely amazing, cause they all taste so divine and I’m getting credits for it, it’s awesome!!! I enjoy my time with Sophie and Claire and outside of class with Daniel and Stina…I feel like I’m still the party person I once was, but I’ve started to be less interested in meeting new people, especially after the summer. Still excited about the prospect of going to Werket and stuff, but I don’t care about seeing new peeps, especially since my regular squad is there, I just wanna have fun with them really…

And personal life wise…I don’t really know.😀 Everything is so confusing and there’s so much drama, I just want to stay in bed, not see anyone and watch series. But I still wanna be good with everyone if that makes sense. I became a bit too invested in a situation that I shouldn’t have gotten myself into in the first place, but it’s all me to blame for that and this is maybe the first time that I feel like I’ve done wrong by others and I don’t like the feeling, cause I’m such a “I don’t wanna hurt anyone!” person and now I guess I’m a bit of a bitch and that doesn’t sit well with me… I need to go out more and do different stuff not to think about it, but I already do so many things ughhh I’m so lazy.

I miss the time when I was younger and more stupid and I thought that life is only black and white and there’s no middle and I didn’t have a clueeeee, those were the days, man!!! What I want now is no boys, no girls, just friends, lots and lots of tea and a different brain. Also I would like it if Joel wouldn’t be so embarrassed to invite me to a pykälä party, why the hell has he created an isäntä profile with his friend and then gone and followed me on instagram, bruh he’s weird.

Speaking of Joel, that reminds me of Jamppa (cause same lukio friend group and all that). Those are still some of my best friends I have and I had a horrible dream yesterday that Jamppa died and I don’t remember feeling so sad and crying so much in a dream. I woke up covered in tears with my heart racing. I realize that this is a projection of something else happening in my life (whatever it is), I don’t usually have nightmares, but seriously I need to see him as soon as he gets back to Finland, because I miss him and I realize that I would really hate it if anything ever happened to him. So yeah there’s that. I guess I feel a bit like shit for the moment.😀

But I’ll be fine!

//Stef – first post of the year, at least it’s still in January!

5 am post for no reason.

Hey!😛

It’s super late (or early, depending on how you see things) and I haven’t posted in aaaaaaages, so I thought I’d whip up something now, as I’ve been in the mood for a few days.

This night reminds me super much of the times, when I used to hide under my covers and chat with Joel till 5am about ridiculous stuff such as cheese (argue is still ongoing) and good looking girls. Haven’t spoken to him in this way lately, cause we’ve both been busy with our separate things (though we’re still close and keep in touch). Feels like so much has changed since those days and we’re so different, but still kind of the same…

I’ve learned how to do my makeup, at least. Haha.😀 16yo me would cringe at the sight of this pic:

Snapchat-450029206896163699

And 20yo me just really doesn’t care, cause a pimps and prostitutes party sounds like a great idea! I’ve been out with friends so much that I have forgotten what it’s like to be alone at home and have nothing to do. There’s always places to go to and people to see, ciders to drink…

Actually now I’m feeling like it’s time for a little break before I go again. Time to let my liver rest and focus on other fattening things such as nutella and pipari cookies. Maybe some bacon. Ok, LOTS of bacon.

I feel like taking pictures of attractive people, so if you’re confident and feel like you need a new profile pic, please tell me, cause I love doing this shit. I’m losing my touch after not having done anything in aaaages. Last person I took pics of was Mimi

_MG_0037.JPG

There’s so much I could still do to this pic, but I want to go out somewhere and take kick ass winter pics like I did last year with Jessica (when I looked like a ghost thanks to the exposure).

_MG_8298.jpg

I would like to also try something a bit more artistic, after all the partying and hanging out with people, I would like to capture someone’s character in a photo, not just snap them so they look good. I’d maybe be interested to work with face paint and thematic clothes, perhaps try different lighting and get a bit less basic, but I’m not sure how many of my friends would be interested in participating in something like this?

This is when I miss Linda the most, she was absolutely crazy and ready to get naked and have clothes painted on her whole body if it meant it would be a good shot. Kinda wanna see her again and get inspired, she’s so good at coming up with the weird shit.

I’d also love to try and take pics of some males? Ones, who are not bitching about life 24/7? Ones that would trust my judgement that I will make them look good and follow my vision? Most guys don’t like their picture taken and I don’t understand why half of my friends are so awkward and are making fun of me wanting to take a pic of them (I mean besides Joel, cause obviously he’s the worst when he wants to). So if you are a guy and would like to have a nice pic taken, plsssssss tell me, cause I so want to do it!

Another thing, I’m super jealous of my father, cause once again he’s travelling the world and is currently in some super warm and tropical place and I’m here being rained on with winds as strong as my hopes for a pass on my ERP course. Ridiculous. So I’m thinking of going to Dubai after January, sounds like a good time for it, just as it’s the coldest here in Finland…let’s see.

What else is new…been hanging out with Sophie and Claire as per usual, went to Slush, somehow managed to attend both afterparties, went to like a gazillion happenings in October and November + Glöggrundan in December, shit was tight.Snapchat-8161976023330535400

The last event was especially bizzare cause almost everyone I knew was there yet I met so many new peeps (Khrm, Daniel’s friends are pretty awesome). I saw Freddie for like 5 min once again. I’ve given up hope with him. He tells me during the summer that he’s been accepted to study in Turku after what I literally see him 2 times (mind you, we were really really good friends and I’m still tight AF with his brother) and 1 of those times has been for 2 min while I was really drunk and outside while being dragged into a festival thingy during a heavy rainfall, so I don’t remember that really well.

Anyway, I just need to rant about this, cause I really thought we could keep in touch and be homies, but distance fucks things up, cause he’s having an awesome life in Turku (not that this is bad, I’m really happy for him) and older friends fade away. It just sucks cause we used to talk so much and be so close and I got used to him being around and having coffee/lunch together almost every day and I really miss him. Nowadays I’m always the one to start the conversation and it always reaches a dead end, so it’s not particularly productive either. But yeah. Daniel is still here and he’s been holding the front on the Tallberg side really well, so I can’t be made at those baby faced brothers. They’re the best and are super hugable and make me smile always with their retarded humor.

Other than that, things have been pretty basic I guess. Dunno what else to say really…Maybe I should hit the hay and stop googling weird stuff such as how many toenails do elephants have, as if that’s of crucial relevance to my life…

Yeah, I’ll do that.

//Stef – Next post will be Soundtrack of my life vol.7😉

A bit too honest.

A bit too honest.

Hey, peeps.

I doubt anyone is reading this anymore, since I make like 5 posts a year, but hello to you if you’re on board!

You know that friend, who is always brutally honest? Yeah, that’s me. Though I think it’s a good thing that I say what I think, sometimes I think that maybe I shouldn’t be too hard on people. Sometimes I feel like my attitude could be hurtful to others and I wouldn’t want to make anyone feel really bad, obviously.

So I made Henkka cry on the phone few weeks ago (and I’ve never heard/seen him cry before. Ever.) because of what a bitch I was to him about something that really bothered him and I kinda regret it. I meant every word I said, so I’d never go back on that, but I should have been a bit gentler and more understanding, which I don’t know how to do sometimes. I can’t tell you how often I say things, which I later realize sound super aggressive and mean even if I don’t mean them that way and I think to myself “well that was fucking dreadful. I hope this person doesn’t think I’m a crazy bitch.”, but let’s be honest, they probably do. It’s worse if I do it over text, because the person can’t hear my tone of voice, so they don’t know what to make of the text and the sad reality is that texting is my preferred method of communication, so misunderstandings happen quite often.

On the other hand, if someone is brutally honest with me, I actually really like it and appreciate it. I take every word as constructive criticism and I somehow respect the person more (that’s why I’m such good friends with Joel). Not everyone is like me, I understand that and that’s why I promise to try and work on myself, but I mean…

There are times, when something is really really bothering me and though most of my thoughts I keep to myself (just cause usually they’re not that interesting to others), if I don’t say the thing, it keeps getting worse and worse and my god, I wouldn’t be surprised if I’d get an ulcer from trying to conceal it. If I have a problem with someone, I have to tell them. I just have to. It makes me feel like a new person. Now, obviously I don’t say the first thing that comes to my mind, I’m not a socially disabled individual, I try to pick my words and not sound like I’ve just come out of a mental facility (like those crazy texting chicks we keep reading about on facebook) and I HOPE no one’s thought that about me, but I mean I’d be the last person to say that I don’t have my moments.

SO! I’m very sorry if I’ve ever sent you a crazy honest text (or said something in person), which made you feel uncomfortable, but on the bright side, if I’ve done it that means that I most likely like you and think you can handle it…and I probably don’t have anything else against you, cause let’s be real, if I had, we wouldn’t be talking. So imma work on being nicer and you work on understanding that that’s just me and sometimes I can’t help it.:)

Have a great weekend, everyone!

//Stef – peace out!