Well, hi there!
Haven’t posted anything in a long while, but I’m kinda out of stuff to write about.
The weather here is horrible, I don’t even want to go out to the store. School is going good, I’ve decided that I’ll cooperate with the system, so the year passes quickly. So far, so good. And my first grades are really good. They’re actually as high as they can be. Yay me.
Ivana is in Turkey, I’m alone on my school desk and 15 people from the class are “sick” (yeah, right), so I feel pretty good and spacious. Viktor got an F because of me, I’m kinda happy about that. Well, it wasn’t because of me, he didn’t study, but I said nothing to him, when he asked me for help…20 times. That’s what you get for being a jackass. We’ll se what will come up next. No help for him. Ever.
What else? Ah yeah, I moved all of my shit to the house. Cause I can and I’m a free bitch, baby. But seriously, the first 2 days were hell, cause my allergy triggered…and it was not nice. I notice this, every time I go to a new place (or a place I haven’t been to in a long time), THIS happens. Thank god it’s not for a whole week. Last time it passed by on the second day, but I thought it was because of the alcohol I drank that day. So guess who drank 500 ml of vodka some days ago? It didn’t help…
And I’ve been thinking recently, where do I want to live. As in which country. Bulgaria is not even an option (so much for the patriotism, haha). I want to first finnish my university studies, but I don’t even know where I want to go. There’s England, Finland, Denmark, Netherlands, Germany, Norway, Sweden, Italy, France and even Lithuania. WHERE? And as what?
I really don’t want to do economics and shit, I want to have fun. Media and Film studies perhaps…or Cinematography, or Film music…or SOMETHING like that. I mean, it would be cool to work with Tarantino, haha :D. Ahh, there’s a huge mess in my head right now, and I kinda have to decide what I want to do in the next couple of months, cause I have to start with the preparations. I like the diversity of choices, but they’re just so many…how can you pick one and not think what would it be like if you had chosen something else? And I have this thing for foreign people…I want to meet all of them, you know. I want to be in a place full of different cultures. I can make great friends from Brazil and Iceland, who knows? This adventure side of me is starting to wake up and people are starting to wonder if I’m okay. I’m so lazy, I don’t even want to go to school, for Christ’s sake! But, there you go! I want to travel big time. It’s good that I’m making plans, but…other people can easily ruin it for me. Venceslav, for instance, ruined it for Gergana. She doesn’t even want to go to university, because of him. She wants to go to Greece, open a bar and live happily ever after with that pile of crap. And I’m egoistic…for now. I honestly don’t care what you’re going to do, as long as you stay out of my bowl of “popara”. Clean toilets, bh. Sell broken stuff to naive people, bh. Feature your voice in an animation, bh. Become the president of the Universe, bh. Go to beauty peagents, bh…simple as that! Bh means боли ме хуя, which means “Stacey is riding a bike”, which means…I don’t give a fuck. 😀 And I don’t want to live here, because I just don’t. Give me one reason to stay here, and I’ll turn right back around. We work with leva, which is not that pleasing. Hard work is not appreciated and honestly, I can live like a queen, somewhere else, with the same knowledge I would earn 1000 lv here. So, you do the math. Ofc, I’ll come back here every year to check on my oldies, but life outside this ignorance just seems better. I mean, we’re 17 years old and 27 of my classmates don’t know english. Whatever this is, it ain’t Sparta. Apart from the language education, the learning institutions are actually quite good. We have soooo many kids, who can’t make it to the next year, so this means we’re good at something. We can’t all be geniuses, but we’re all treated like ones. All the people outside the country say that they learn far less, than when they were here. But I’m going to graduate my high school education in Bulgaria anyway, so…bh.
People here don’t understand me. They just want to finish school, start working, have a bunch of kids and live like normal people. I want lots of money, prestige, good reputation, fun, concerts, high life, VIP tables and most importantly, something to be remembered with. I don’t think what I want is bad. If some people can do it, so can I. I just have to have my priorities straighten out and it’s just a matter of time. Slowly, but surely, by the time I’m 27, I’ll be happy with myself and what I’ve done. Of course, as much as I can’t stand my classmates, I wish them all the best, as well. Cause I’m not a hateful person. We’ll see each other in 20 years or so, and we’ll see what life had in mind for us, let’s hope it’s all good and we all survive to 2030!
Well, that’s it. I don’t feel like writing anymore 😀 😛
//Stef – пиша, трия, пиша, трия…