League of Legends – LoL


So that’s the new game I’m playing.

I discovered it like a week ago, maybe a bit less and it’s been a real pain in the ass. I asked Henkka to teach me what to do and he talked to me on skype for like an hour, trying to explain what this shit really is. I was pretty curious and tried to follow his orders, but I can’t help it that I suck so much. It’s not my fault. Or maybe it is, but I’m not doing it on purpose, I try to click fast and run and use my spells and learn the tricks. On the first game I played with Henkka and Joel I died 14 times, didn’t kill anyone, just a few meaningless minions that didn’t do anything so dramatic. That’s pretty pathetic. Like, seriously bad. The baddest of all bad. Most people die only once and kill at least 15 champions. Altogether, for this week, for all games, I have killed no more than 5 champions and most of them were a steal kill, which means that I only tried to help in destroying them and luckily got the last shot.

Joel made numerous attempts at teaching me how to play, he tried to talk me through the game, tell me what to buy from the store, asked me to use my spells, when appropriate, told me when to run and just did all kinds of lovely things for my well-being in the game. Little by little, seeing that I make no progress whatsoever, his anger started to slowly build up inside him, his usual calm temper suppressing the rage that he was feeling towards my gaming abilities and his witty tongue only noting the good parts about my performance, as well as pointing out what I should do differently in the next game. But nothing lasts forever. Even though the dude tells me that I suck pretty much 5 times a day, I pretend not to listen and keep playing. Today he raised his hands and told me to stop playing completely, cause I’m so very hopeless that he can’t take it. But look at Henkka…he knows I suck major ass, but he doesn’t bother with me. He’s just like “Alright…Stef plays…cool” and he doesn’t go into all caps rages about it. 😀 And there’s one thing we have to deal with – we can’t control our friends’ minds. I will stop playing, whenever I feel like I’ve played enough. No one is obligated to play with me, though I do find it fun. But still…I’m not asking you to always stand by me. If you hate my suckiness so much, just don’t accept games with me. And if I don’t get better at one point, naturally I’ll give up on my own, no one wants to get their ass kicked forever. Besides, I have somehow gotten better at assisting people to kill, as well as dying a bit less.

I’m a girl and I don’t play video games. This is my first ever attempt at something like this and I don’t give even a slight fuck if I’m the best or not. Of course, I get agitated if I have a really bad game, I swear and I fist my desk, but it’s not my whole life! And I know it’s a team game, but most of the times I am somehow helping, even if it’s a small contribution and the people I’m playing with are usually good and don’t have the tendency to call me a dumbass. Which means that they would win even without me being in the game and I’m more kind of a protector than actually a knight. Just fucking deal with it. I can play some characters and some are difficult, I like keeping my distance and I like having speed for running, cause I’m slow by default. So what? I’m not good. There are plenty of other noobs, who are just as bad, or even worse than I am. And I’m gonna keep playing. Just saying.

I’m even gonna go play a game right about now.

//Stef – Ciao


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